More Fun. Have Some Jokes on Us.

Corny vegan jokes
– Why did the tofu cross the road?
To prove it wasn’t chicken.


– What’s a vegan’s favorite horror movie?

The Silence of the Yams.

 

– Why did the vegan go deep-sea fishing?

Just for the halibut!

 

– How do you make a vegan
sausage roll?

Push it down a hill.

– What’s a vegan’s favorite
hangout?

The salad bar.
– Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the vegan salad
dressing!
– What’s a vegan’s favorite
exercise? Crunches… especially
with celery!
– What’s a vegan’s favorite rock
band? The Beetles.
– Why did the vegan go to school?
To improve their “kale-culations”!
– What do you call a vegan
postman? A vegetable courier.
What’s a vegan’s favorite
detective show? “Kale of the
Wild.

How does a vegan flirt? “If you
were a vegetable, you’d be a
cutecumber!”
– Why did the vegan become a
banker? To save their beans.
– What’s a vegan’s favorite city?
Brussels (as in sprouts).
– Why did the vegan bring a ladder
to the bar? To reach the high nuts.
– What do vegan zombies eat?
Graaaaaains!
– What’s a vegan’s favorite school
subject? Herbology.
– Why did the vegan go to the
beach? To seaweed.
– What’s a vegan’s favorite type of
joke? Anything corny!
– What’s a vegan’s favorite type of
shoe? Anything but crocs.
– Why did the vegan refuse to play
hide and seek? They always found
themselves in a pickle.
– What’s a vegan’s favorite type of
nut? The one they’re dating.
– Why did the vegan refuse to read
the newspaper? It wasn’t organic.
– What’s a vegan’s favorite type of
tea? Green, with a hint of
compassion.
– What’s a vegan’s favorite type of
music? Anything but meat-loaf.
– Why did the vegan refuse to play
the lottery? They didn’t want to
cash in their chips.
– What’s a vegan’s favorite type of
movie? Anything but chick-flicks.
– What’s a vegan’s favorite type of
dance? The veggie-tango.
– Why did the vegan refuse to play
golf? They didn’t want to hit the
greens.
– What’s a vegan’s favorite type of
car? Anything but a meat wagon.